The Lez Boat...soon will be making another run...the Lez Boat...promises something for everyone

IMPORTANT - EVERYONE GOING ON THE CRUISE, UPDATE: YOU HAVE TO BE ON THE BOAT BY 2 pm because if we don't leave by 4 PM, we will hit the hurricane.

And so begins my 8 day coverage of the inaugural journey of the SWEET travel line - The Sweet Caribbean Cruise, starring Hurricane Ida! I'm coming to you today from N'Orleans (I learned how to say it last night), where I am at a kinkos paying way too much for copies.*

I'm going to try to remember what happened last night at the kick off parties. Through the fog I do recall saying I was not going to drink too much, party too hard or stay out all night on the first night. Ooops.

We started off at the Sweet Kick Off party on the Mississippi, then went over to the only lesbian bar in town, called Rubyfruit Jungle where owner Mary told us NOT TO GO ON THE CRUISE WITH A HURRICANE COMING! Since lesbians are infamous for ignoring red flags, we just smiled and nodded.

The Jungle is rumoured to be haunted, so we were trying to talk to the spirits. Prior to us arriving, a tour bus had stopped by as part of a haunted tour. Mary told us this joint is frequented by ghosts and "those of the vampire lifestyle."

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*I just learned the lesson of planning. Instead of printing and copying my script in Los Angeles, I just paid $50 to do it here. So much for fucking brunch today. Meanwhile, please come to my script reading of THE ROAD TO DINAH on the cruise on Day Four at 7 pm. Starring Mariah Hanson, Erin Foley, Nicol Paone and Dalilah Rajad.